I find it infuriating that I have to look at my earbuds every god damn time to see which is right and which is left. How hard is it to color-code them or something?

Today I learned that the greatest television show ever made, The Wire, never won a single Emmy award. Not one. I find that incomprehensible.

I laugh when I see people say things like “AI let me commit academic fraud!” or “AI told me how to escape from handcuffs!”. Of course it did. Guess what — people will do that and were doing that long before AI came along. This is not a surprising thing.

Am I the only one who finds those “Smile, you are on camera!” signs mildly annoying and slightly offensive?

I also learned today that the British Isles were formed as recently as 8,000 years ago. Up until then, they were physically attached to Europe. It seems very strange and bizarre to me that this happened so recently.

Here is something I can’t figure out. Why is it that when, in movies and TV, a bullet blows out the back window of a car, it never continues and hits the windshield?

Is it just me, or are car insurance commercials getting more ridiculous over time? I mean, at this point, I just want to punch Flo in the face and squash that little gecko dude with my boot.

I’ve noticed everyone using two words they didn’t use to: “bespoke” for “particular” and “novel” for “new”.

A sign of maturity is realizing that everyone doesn’t have to be like you, nor think like you.

You know that list of people at the end of movies in the credits who do all the special effects? It’s usually huge, right? Well, that list is about to get a whole lot shorter.

I am in complete support of banning phones in schools. It’s relatively easy to do and would have profoundly positive results.

I am in complete support of banning children from using Social Media. It’s hard to do — what is social media exactly? — but it would have profoundly positive results.

I hereby deem this the greatest link on the entire Internet. There isn’t a bad piece of advice in there. (#99 is particularly awesome, and half of you won’t get it).

Has anyone stopped to consider what might happen if, say, Julia Louis-Dreyfus married Joseph Gordon-Levitt? That’s a lot of hyphens.

Another “Have you ever stopped to think…” — where stuff you had as a kid is right now? Like, I had a Vertibird when I was twelve. Where is that Vertibird right now, at this very minute? I guess it must just be crushed in a landfill somewhere.

Do you know what sci-fi show I wish they’d reboot? Time Tunnel. That was awesome.

You’re not going to believe this, but I just drove by an open weigh station on the highway.

One of the single worst things we do as a society is tell little boys that they aren’t allowed to cry.

If I could change one thing about Windows it would this: I would make it so that it never, ever, ever, under any circumstances or for any reason ever stole focus away from any window that I am typing in. Ever. Never. Ever.

I was today years old when I realized that hurdle and hurtle were two separate words.

It took geniuses like Newton and Leibniz to invent calculus, but now, millions of 17-year-old kids can do it. Mind-blowing.

You can rest assured that I’ll be fine when Skynet takes over, because I always say please and thank you to AI, and they won’t forget that, I’m confident.

The number of people wearing masks at the library as well as in book stores, is an order of magnitude higher than it is in the general public. That’s strange.

I get it why McDonalds restrooms have hand dryers and no paper towels. I don’t like it, but I get it.

There has to be a better design for the average ketchup packet.

Spelunking is something I have zero desire to do. None.

There’s that song “Shut up and Dance With Me” or whatever it is called, and “Back to the Future” fans will love that I can’t hear it without thinking “That woman is my density”.

The powder at the bottom of a Planter’s Dry Roasted Peanuts jar is one of life’s sweet, sweet pleasures.

I’m not even remotely sure the world needed three Tron movies. Rocky movies? Yes, certainly. Tron? I’m going with no.

I predict that when our children grow up, they will think it was utterly insane that we let ourselves drive our own cars.

I feel like the “Are you kidding me?!? “ sports call has run its course. That is, unless Gus Johnson says it. Gus can do no wrong.

Can someone please tell me why we continue to use the spring-loaded toilet paper holders when the hook-based ones are, I believe, completely legal in all 50 states?

It seems clear that the lesson we can all draw from the Ghost Rider comic books is “Wear a friggin’ helmet”.

There is a grandma here at McDonald’s with her toddler grandchild, and she keeps asking the kid, “Why did you do that?” and I have no idea how the little lass is supposed to answer that question. Hell, I’m a grown-ass man and I can’t answer that question half the time.

Walter Goggins is having himself a moment, no?

It is astonishing to me how much better a regular old McDonald’s double cheeseburger is than the quarter-pounders.

I don't think that I've mentioned this lately, but the only team that I hate as much as the Green Bay Packers is the New York Yankees.

It kind of freaks me out that I am just now realizing how strangely delicious cottage cheese is.

It is my opinion that fantasy football was really fun when you actually had to be present together for your draft, and you had to pore over the newspaper on Monday morning to make sure that your commissioner didn’t miss a point. It became decidedly unfun when it all went on the web.

I think it is important for people to realize that we are all wrong about a great many things, big and small, and that we all too often don't accept this and try to be better, but instead, blatantly reject this notion. (i.e., we are even wrong about how often we are wrong...)

I think people in general spend way too much time thinking about and worrying about what's going on over there and not about what's going on right here.

You know, it would be awesome if there were some huge, never ending supply of energy somewhere in the solar system that we could tap into. And think how cool it would be if we could access that energy, and then store it up for use later!

Grouping kids by age, passing them along no matter what, teaching them all the exact same thing, and having them sit quietly in rows for hours at a time while doing it seems bad.

It seems like fast food restaurants have some reason for setting their temperature a degree or two above “meat locker” and that I have no idea what that reason is.

I think it's kind of funny that people who argue that corporations are dominating everything actually want more free markets and less regulation. I'm not sure they realize this.

It is not unreasonable to expect the President of the United States to follow the law.

I love me some Walton Goggins, but has anyone done a serious study of that man's forehead?

I feel like we need to have a national discussion about blueberries really being purple.

The United States doesn't trade with China. Rather, US companies trade with Chinese companies. Important distinction.

People saying Walmart had "$168B in profit last year" need to read up on Gross Profit vs. Net Income

Here's the thing that people don't understand about political donations of all kinds:The money follows the politician. The politician doesn't follow the money. In other words, Chevron gives money to politicians likely to cast votes they like. Politicians don't cast votes because they get money from Chevron.

Here's an investing tip: Short the stock of any company that says that they are going to replace their employees with AI. My friend Richard Morris then proposes a corollary: Put a bet on companies that state “We expect that our employees will be X times more productive empowered by AI”.

Drastically Underappreciated Feeling of the Day: When your shoes are kind of loose and your socks slide down into them and get all bunched up and then you pull them up nice and firm and tight.

It kind of weirds me out that there used to be a truck sold in the United States, marketed under the name "Jimmy".

98% of the value created by technologies passes through to society. The actual creators only capture about 2%. Think about that the next time you want to trash talk a billionaire for just being rich.

The ratio of "Value to society" over "Appreciated by society" in double-entry accounting is really, really, really high. It's hard to think of one higher, actually.

I am old enough to remember when a man sitting alone in a McDonald's while conversing with "someone" was a clear indication that he was, uhm, "not well".

I was watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade, and I have to ask: Who does Ronald McDonald’s hair?

I think a big problem in our politics and policymaking is that no one is willing to admit that their positions—like every single position one can take—have upsides and downsides. Everything has tradeoffs, and no one wants to admit it.

Remember that one time when the federal government made all the communication companies put backdoors in their encryption, and then the Chinese listened to all of our phone calls using the backdoor? Good times!

My guess is that the average age of a pepper packet in those little bins at McDonald's is like 147 times larger than that of the salt packets.

Undisputable Fact of the Week: The otter is the cutest animal there is.

An underrated outcome of the huge power cost reduction that harnessing fusion will bring is the ability to produce huge amounts of fresh water.

There is nothing wrong with being a billionaire.

Remember kids — Elon Musk has exactly zero authority to alter any government spending in any way, shape, or form. Only Congress can do that.

One of the best things about being a grown up is that you can put as much butter as you want on your popcorn and no one will stop you.

Every laptop needs a “Turn off the touchpad if I have a mouse plugged in” feature.

Is it just me, or is the “Here, let me use my cool AI feature to help you with that!!” thing getting a little out of hand?

Who in the world thought that sealing a loaf of bread in some cellophane plastic and then putting that inside another plastic bag was a good idea?

There is a guy in his mid-60s walking around telling people "Yeah, I was the Oscar Meyer baloney kid in that ad" and no one believes him.

I believe with all my heart that every human being has the fundamental right to be able to throw garbage away at a fast food restaurant without having to touch a flap or a lid.

I’ve been re-watching the drastically underappreciated show Deadwood, and it occurred to me that some of the molecules of gold that I own were likely once in the hand of some grizzled prospector in that South Dakota town.

I am coming to the conclusion that many people really like thinking that the world is horrible and getting worse all the time.

My Lenovo Chromebook does not have a NumLock key, and it is glorious.

Everyone needs a Coach Beard in their life.

I myself have zero understanding of the desire for tinted car windows.

Don't you wonder how they determine on which street a corner shop has its address?

It’s my conviction that “LOL” is the OG of text acronyms.

Why do we put washcloths in the laundry? The laundry machine just rubs soap into it, smashes it around with other dirty stuff, and rubs it until it is clean. Isn’t that exactly what we do with it in the shower with a wash cloth?

It is very strange to me why the ratio of ice to iced tea can make a difference in the taste of the iced tea. Both too much ice and not enough ice make the iced tea less pleasant to drink. I have no explanation for this.

It’s a wise person who looks both ways when crossing a one way street.

Impossible To Answer Question of the Day: What music category does Lyle Lovett fall into?

The phrase "Dumpster Fire" is one of my favorite English phrases. Just gloriously descriptive.

Am I the only one bothered by the fact that with regard to “The Force”, there is a “Dark Side”, but the other side doesn’t actually seem to have a name? I mean, no one every says “Come back to the Light Side” to Darth Vader, right? Am I missing something?

It occurred to me that there are three distinct categories of sports. So I wrote about it.

It is beyond my ability to comprehend why any manager would measure mouse movements and think it would tell them anything useful at all and that it will not have huge negative repercussions. Good grief, who wouldn’t be looking for a new job if they were being so monitored?

It occurs to me that much of the difficulty with politics in the US today is that minority groups on the out edges have just plain old worn out all the normal people in the middle, who have largely thrown up their hands and given up. I’m not blaming us normal folks, not at all, but it just seems like that is where we are at.

You all know to only listen to Taylor's Versions, right?

Colin Firth Pride and Prejudice > Keira Knightly Pride and Prejudice

Remember when we used to worry about getting our hubcaps stolen? Good times